Card Parody #2: Monster Reborn
Created Date: 17 Jan

You may have seen the first Card Parody; it covered Raigeki, making it pointlessly complicated when all it does is destroy all monsters your opponent controls. This time, I'm looking at another famous Yu-Gi-Oh! card, Monster Reborn. This card is currently Limited, as of May 21, 2018, so only one copy can be in any tournament/competitive deck.
Here's the original:
Here's the original:
The basis of the original is that you get to grab any monster that was destroyed in any way and sent to either player's Graveyard, and bring it back (face-up). You could do this for a neat comeback, or maybe you discarded a monster to combo with this and summoned the monster right back.
Also, since there is a semicolon after "GY", it means that the other player could respond (Chain) if they wish, and try to move that target so that Monster Reborn does nothing. That way, it's not totally broken!

For example, Disappear is a direct counter, if you ever carry that card. It will move the target out of play, so Monster Reborn will resolve pointlessly. This is because the target is now gone from the Graveyard, but you have already committed to that choice for Monster Reborn's effect.
It is also worth noting that Disappear does not target. Those kinds of cards are nice to have, since you don't have to commit to a choice.

Well, geez, now it's five lines? Is that even necessary? Let's talk about it.
- You can only activate this card if a monster (min. 1) is in the GY.
Well, of course. The point of this card is to bring back the monster from the Graveyard, so it has to be in the Graveyard. And of course, the minimum number of monsters in the Graveyard must be 1, if any are there in the first place. So this line can be scrapped completely.
- Target 1 monster in either player's GY, also, after that,
Okay, so the first clause is the same, no big deal. However, the conjuction "also, after that" is new, and because there is no semicolon after the first clause anymore, the opponent cannot respond to this card with any ordinary Trap or Quick-Play Spell.
That means they must resort to something that negates the activation or effect of the card, not just get around it (for example, Solemn Judgment, Magic Jammer, etc).
- Special Summon that target in Attack or Defense position (your choice, but it must be face-up).
Obviously, if you can choose Attack or Defense position, then it must be your choice, anyway, so that's unnecessary. The requirement that it must be face-up is OK, because there are cards like Burst Rebirth that Special Summon face-down, but if nothing was stated about whether it should be face-up or face-down, the implication is that it must be face-up anyway.
Lastly...
- and if you do, send this card to the GY immediately after this effect resolves.
Yeah, this is totally unneeded as well. By default, activated spells go to the Graveyard after they finish resolving. Also, as you saw above, since this version would have to be negated upon activation anyway, the conjunctive "and if you do" is no longer applicable (the entire card is prevented from activating, so...).
Well, that was fun. Somehow, I think we just made Monster Reborn even more broken. In fact, this version might actually get banned, if it ever went into circulation (it'll never happen)! Anyways, I hope you enjoyed, and I'll see you on the next Card Parody!